Busy and Lazy

This last week was pretty good! Christmas was fun and relaxing. Well, more like lazy! :) W/ the kids out of school, I've been home watching them, while Nani and Matt are at work. They've been pretty good, surprisingly. For me, it's been a little... boring. I LOVE my nephews, but it's hard to keep them entertained w/ out one or both fighting w/ the other. The little one has a temper, so when we play games and he loses, he gets really upset! We let him win a lot, but it gets pretty boring when he's the only one winning. Plus we don't have any transportaion to go anywhere. I'm not used to staying home all week just watching kids. I miss working and being out of the house, but then I think to myself... "How are you gonna be a stay-at-home mom, if you can't handle it part-time now?" I guess I'll figure it out whenever it happens. :)

Two days before Christmas was Kai's birthday. We had a little party and it was fun. We had pizza and then some cake and ice cream. He got presents, of course, and then we played games and hung out.

Christmas eve was pretty busy! Nani and I got paid that day and I still had to go shopping. I got a couple of things for the boys earlier, but I still needed to shop for Nani and Matt. We went to the mall and it was crazy! First off, traffic was a mess, then parking was ridiculous too! There were tons of people in every store and the line was always crazy long! But, luckily for us, we found a parking spot pretty quick, when we got in line I was the next person, and we were able to get things pretty quick and at really good prices!

Then it was off to go back home and start the dinner! It was simple this year, since it was just us and one of Matt's friends. We had ham, potato salad, and rice. The ham was soo good! We ate it for four nights straight! And it kept getting better each time!

Nani started a new family tradition. She was wanting to get the boys something every year but wasn't sure what. I then told her about a family from my mission, the Pattersons, who gave their kids pajamas every year, and that was the present they opened every Christmas eve. We all got pajama pants! The kids later went to bed and then it was time for Nani and I to be in Santa's workshop full-time. During the night we were in there, but now we were able to really get things done. We finished around 2am! Nani didn't realize how much she got until we sat down to wrap everything. It's funny because she said every year she thinks the boys won't get much for Christmas but then when she puts everything under the tree it's a lot more than she expected. :) She buys things slowly and then every time she goes out again to shop she tells herself she'll just grab a couple more small things but ends up getting more than a couple. Everything adds up and the boys always have an awesome Christmas morning.

I wasn't expecting much, or even anything for Christmas. I think I mentioned in a previous blog, my sister paid for me to come out here and got me a job w/ her while I'm here, so that was a lot already. Well, I got a beanie from Emily's mom, Retha, and then I got a few other things from my sister and my parents. The picture shows what I got. And I read the entire book in just a few hours! Maybe this time next year I'll have "someone" to blog about. :) *fingers crossed*

After we all opened presents, Nani and I went back to sleep. It was a lazy day. The next morning we got up and went out for a drive, to get out of the house. We weren't sure where we were going but no one wanted to stay in the house. We ended up going down to North Carolina and we went to the Outer Banks. We were in Currituk and went to take pictures on the beach. We got stuck in the sand! At first we weren't in too bad but as Matt tried to get out, it sunk in more. You can see in the picture how the car leans toward the front passenger side.

About 7 cars went past us, until anyone stopped to ask if we needed help. 7! Seriously?! We eventually were towed out by some very nice people w/ a truck! It took a while because they had a chain, but were afraid it'd take the bumper off the Honda, so they used a smaller tow rope w/ a hook, that broke off of the truck. They tried the chain again and were having some problems. I went off to the side, by that time we had been stuck for close to 20 minutes now, and said a prayer. They tried again and we were pulled out! We thanked the guys and we went our seperate ways. Right after we said thank you and started to drive away, the sheriff came driving up. Apparently they are crazy about people stopping or parking along the beach. Someone told us that they'd come and give us a ticket if we didn't hurry. Talk about timing! I know it was because of the prayer that I said, that we were able to get out of the sand and drive away w/o a ticket. It's the little things like that, that strenghten my testimony. If the Lord hears and answers something small like that, you KNOW He answers bigger and harder ones too!

Well, I hope your Christmas was an enjoyable and memorable one. I hope you have a fun and safe New Year and until next time... Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

'Tis the season

Hello all! This last week was pretty good!

On Friday we went to see the lights at the botanical garden, here in Norfolk. It was awesome because we took the top off of Matt's Jeep and went through it listening to Christmas music. There were a lot of trees that you drive between, and they had decorated those w/ lights, which were hanging down. We were able to really see the lights above us. Way cool!After that we took the boys to "Toys 'R Us" to pick out toys for two other kids, that are less fortunate. We then took those toys to the mall, just across the parking lot to "Stuff the Bus" w/ Z-104, the local radio station. Last year they stuffed 10 buses, totally shooting their goal, of about 4 buses, out of the water. When we got down there, they finished filling 11 buses!

(A shot of the filled buses, it goes down pretty far)

(The boys helped to fill bus # 12)
(My munchkins next to one of the filled buses)

It was neat because at least half of those buses were filled w/ bikes! And not just little bikes, but there were some bigger ones too! I have never seen so many toys to be given away, in one place. It was so nice to see the "Spirit of Christmas" being showed by so many people. I mean, every year there is the Salvation Army, the Armed Forces, Toys for Tots, and many other organizations collecting for people and families. But I have never seen the end product of it. Of course it wasn't the end of the bus thing, but I mean, there was a lot to look at already! I guess I'm just trying to say that it was really nice to watch my nephews be apart of something bigger than all of us!

Remember the "reason for the season" you guys! I just want you all to know that I am so grateful for our Savior, Jesus Christ! For his ultimate sacrfice, and for opening the doors to eternal life. I'm so excited for this time of year, to celebrate w/ the rest of the world, the birth of our elder brother, Jesus Christ. It's great that no matter what you believe in, Christmas time is a time that we can all at least attempt to be unified in sharing love to everyone. Many do it in forms of service to the needy, or in giving to others, or just in actually being "home" for the holidays! Wherever you are this holiday season, be sure to let your family know how much you love them and be sure to thank the Lord for the many blessings you and your family has received this and every year! I love you all and wish the a most wonderous and joyous Christmas! Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

(Christmas 2007 in Hawaii)

Running around Virginia

It's been a pretty good week so far! I've been enjoying work, which is a definite plus, and my nephews have been making me laugh, for the most part. :) I decided to add some pics this post, so you wonderful people could see my cute little guys. First, let me tell you a little about work.

As you know, I've been working w/ my sister at the Langley Airforce Exchange, aka "the BX." How it got that name I do not know. Last week I was a fragrance model. Basically, I was one of those girls that stand around asking to spray you w/ a new perfume. Not something I enjoyed, because my table was set up next to two other ladies modeling other designers. Talk about competition. I had four fragrances from Dolce & Gabana, two for men and two for women. W/ any purchase of our product(s), we also had a free gift. I had a couple of things to offer. We had a light blue "beach" bag- not really a beach bag but thats what it looked like, to go along w/ the fragrance of the same name, and we had a towel. Also we had some boxes to use for wrapping. Nice boxes I must say, they even came w/ tissue paper! :) Well, I was supposed to keep track of what was purchased and we did about $250 in just D&G. I think we could've done more if I was set up next to the other two ladies. I felt bad because they needed to sell their products too, but at the same time I needed to get mine out there! All in all, we did pretty good for ourselves, but fragrance modeling is not my favorite. I just didn't like to have to bother anyone to smell my products or feel pressured to get anything.

As for my little munchkins, they are definitely a hand full! But how could you expect anything else out of two boys aged 8 and 6? We went to the park this weekend out in Pungo, a cute little town about 30-45 minutes away. I took some pics of the boys and Matt swinging and playing on the playground. It was COLD, but still fun!

The next day the boys and Matt put the Christmas tree up while Nani and I went shopping. My mom later asked me to take pics of the boys in front of the tree. These are some we took. :)

I am enjoying my stay out here in Virginia. I definitely miss everyone and everything back in Utah, and especially in Hawaii! I hope to visit my family in the islands again sooner than later. :) Work is good, sometimes I get to change things up and just stock products on the sales floor or organize the many boxes in the back, and visiting my family is fun too! The boys are getting big so fast, and it's always nice to be w/ my older sis and her hubby!

Today, my sister and I went cruising! After taking the boys to school, we had breakfast at "Bagels and More." Which, by the way, was really delicious! Then we headed over to "Toys R Us" and then over to the Lynnhaven Mall. It was cool, they have 2 level carousel on one end. I know that sounds weird, 2 levels, but basically it looks like a typical carousel and then the inner circle is a level up w/ more chairs, horses, etc to ride. It looked pretty cool! When we go again I'll be sure to take a picture. I want to ride it w/ the boys. :)

We also met up w/ Matt during his lunch break and went to "Tropical Smoothies." They have really good sandwiches and smoothies. There isn't a "Jamba Juice" here. I got my sister hooked on a different flavor. She usually just got strawberry-banana, lame! After that, we came back to Norfolk to get the boys from school. We orginially wanted to check out some stores for Christmas gifts and then watch "Blind Side," but w/ the show started too late and we were 30 minutes away as well, so we would've been late to get the kiddies. Instead we just went window shopping.

Well I hope you all are doing well. It's so fun to keep up w/ your blogs and see what's going on w/ you all. Have a wonderful week and I hope to post again soon! Love you all! Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

"Virginia is for lovers"

"Attention customers and employees, please evacuate the building as soon as possible." That's what I heard, barely, over the PA system, today at work. A few minutes later another similar announcement was given, only this time it was a guy and he pretty much yelled! I made my way to the entrance and found my sister and we waited. We thought it was a drill, but then the fire department came and a bunch of MPs (military police). Soon, the MPs were blocking off the road and yelling at us to get to the other end of the parking lot, far away from the building.

We later met up w/ some other ladies from work, at the employee parking lot and eventually went down the road to "Church's chicken" and had some lunch while we waited. It took about two hours before they let us back in. Funny thing... After parking the car and walking into work, I was thinking, "I should keep the car keys on me," but I put it in my sister's bag, like always. Oh well!

My sister, Nani, has been amazing! As usual! :) It's been fun working w/ her. She works crazy hard and is super effecient! The first day I worked w/ her, I was baffled on how much she is able to get done, by herself! The amount of work she does is normally accomplished w/ more than one person. But alas, my sister truly is "Super Woman" and gets it done alone.


Virginia has been good to me! It's been very wet and cooling down daily, but I'm grateful that it's similar to Hawaii weather, just a little cooler. :) Definitely a benefit for me, compared to the Utah weather! Don't get me wrong, I love the snow and think it's amazing, but I just can't handle the cold! I'm cold all the time and the added cold from the weather, just makes my world a little less bareable...

Who says "Virginia is for lovers?" I'm totally missing out on this, because 1: I don't know who said this or where it came from, and 2: I ain't gettin' no love! Well not any from outside of my family, at least. Everyone thinks I'm gonna meet some guy out here and that he's gonna sweep me off my feet, and that I'm never going back to Utah. Well Mr. Sweeper... hurry up and get your broom 'cause my feet are gettin' pretty dusty and I definitely need to be swept off of 'em! :) I promise to try to be patient, and I'll for sure keep you, my "stalkers," updated.

Not much else going on other than that! We are going to Matt and Nani's friend's house for Thanksgiving! I'm pretty stoked because all we're taking is a dessert. :) Matt said that Chris is bringing out his tractor and hitchin' a trailer to it. They're gonna fill it w/ hay and give the little kids hay rides. How cool! Then later, we're gonna have a bonfire! Good food, good company, and good fun! What more could you want? Well my little "stalkers," I hope your Thanksgiving is a most splendid one! Eat well, be safe, and have fun! Remember what you're grateful for and be sure to show it! Until next time... Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

Leaving on a jet plane...

To all my faithful stalkers, I mean followers... :) I apologize for the lack of posts. I personally think it's better to have time between posts, that way there's more for me to blog about.

Here's the latest of what's going on.

I am leaving for Virginia tomorrow morning and will be there until January. It's gonna be a long trip but I'm definitely looking forward to it! I was originally going for Christmas break to help watch my nephews while they were out of school. I got worried because I would have been gone for about 3 weeks, and that's a lot of work to miss. Missed work equals to less money, which then translates to unpaid bills. I told my sister that I wasn't sure if I could come out because of this. She then told me that I could work w/ her while I was out there. Then she said I could go out earlier and work more, and get caught up on my bills. I was worried to be gone for so long but I feel like this is a great opportunity for me. I have great jobs here and I love them both, it's just that the recession makes life difficult. Hours were cut earlier this year at the Distribution Center and that effected me a lot. Recently, hours were cut at California Pizza Kitchen, and now I'm in a pretty deep hole. Sometimes I am able to get more shifts, but not enough. Now that I'm leaving to work w/ my sister, I'm hoping things will get better! I should be able to get caught up and hopefully even be able to save some money too!

Last night I got a phone call from the University of Phoenix. I entered my information on one of their sites, to get more info about nursing school. They called to follow up on that. In all honesty, I just wanted to get some emails about it to see if I'd even be interested. Instead, someone called and then transfered me to a counselor to map out furthering my education w/ them. It was interesting because after I was transfered, the counselor asked, "What can I help you w/?" I laughed a little and said, "I'm not sure, she called ME." Well, we worked it out and started to talk about school. I expressed an interest in becoming a nurse, but as I talked to Jared, the counselor, he helped me realize that I'm not very passionate about becoming a nurse. He asked why I was considering nursing and I told him it was because when I was little my papa (grandpa) was really sick and I tried to help him get better. He later passed away of colon cancer, but at the age of 4 yrs. old, I didn't understand that he wasn't coming back. I would tell my mom and gammy (grandma) that I was "going to dig up papa and clean him up and make him better again." I continued to say, throughout my childhood, that I would become a nurse. I have also been told that I'd be a great nurse because I'm "so caring and compassionate and work well w/ people." well, Jared understood this all, and then asked me if it's what I wanted. He said that lots of people w/ those same attributes make great teachers, as well. He said that many people go to school for things that "make sense" but later realize it's not what they want to do. I then said, "well there's no sense in forcing a square into a circle." Why force it?

We talked about it a little more and he then asked another question, "which are you more passionate about? Nursing or teaching?" Right then and there I realized that nursing wasn't my passion! I don't really have a "passion" per se, but I would much rather be a teacher than a nurse. I can only handle so much when it comes to human anatomy, but I love kids! I would have so much fun teaching in an elementary!

Well, to make a longer story short, I decided that I would look into elementary education a little more. I've been planning on culinary arts, but I think I'll go down the education route and then maybe later, culinary arts. It was really cool because Jared wasn't pressuring me at all. You know how, sometimes, people who are endorsing things often seem to pressure you into using their products? Jared wasn't like that at all. If he did, he would've convinced me to take up nursing. As of right now, I have an appointment to talk to him next Monday, over the phone, since I'm leaving and all. We are going to set me up to start taking classes online in February. I'm really excited! He asked if I wanted to get things set now or if I wanted to think about it, and I told him that "if I think about it too much, it's not gonna happen." I felt so motivated and excited!

A cool thing too, was that his family is from Big Island! When I heard his name I was like, "I know Loo's from Big Island" and that was before he told me. He grew up here so I don't know him but I'm sure I know some of his family. I thought we were related somehow, but I asked my dad and he said that it's more of a "calabash" relation and through marriage from the Bertlemanns. We had fun talking about Hawaii and the "ono kine grindz." We shared info on places here that have the "good stuff" and I'm excited to go there when I get back!

And so my dear followers, I bid thee farewell for a few more days until I can get settled and have time to blog again. I promise that I will have good things to share, next time! And I will do my best to have pictures too! Have a wonderful week and keep smiling! Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

Stake Conference

We had stake conference this weekend, and can I just say that it was awesome?! I don't often have the chance to go to the Saturday meeting of stake conferences, 'cause I'm normally working. But I was able to attend this time. Mostly because I was asked to speak. :S

The topic for our conference was "Holy habits and righteous routines." My stake president asked me to speak on the "habit of prayer" about a month ago. I was surprised that he asked me! Normally I enjoy speaking in church, so I was pretty excited. The reason I enjoy speaking in church is because I get a lot out of it. But I also figure that there really aren't that many people listening. It might just be my way of getting rid of "butterflies" or whatever, but that's what I think.

In a regular family ward, you have the older people who already love you. Whatever you say will make them love you more. Then you have the younger kids, from youth and primary. They are so preoccupied w/ coloring, snacks, the opposite sex, and what have you, that they aren't listening anyways. Basically you are left w/ a smaller amount of people that are truly listening and not just hearing. Those are the few that I speak to. I understand that there are more people listening, most likely, but that's what I think about. However, as time went by and it got closer to our stake conference, I became nervous! It was really weird for me since I ACTUALLY look forward to speaking in church. I had so much time to prepare, and I really did try to. But when it comes down to it all, I am never able to convey what I would like to in a talk until the night before/ morning of. I don't know why that is, but seriously, every time I try to prepare in advance, it doesn't flow. When I procrastinate, sort of, it works out. And even when I write things down, I only say about half of it when I actually speak. Weird, I know, but that's how it is.

It was about an hour and a half before the meeting and I'm texting my roommates that we should leave between 5:30PM and 5:45PM so we can find parking and so I won't be late. My roommates get home about 5PM and I'm rushing to finish my thoughts. Then I have to finish getting ready. I'm moving along quite rapidly, and then I wait in the living room for everyone else. Emily comes down and says she can't go 'cause she's really sick, and then she asks, "Is Ray still going?" I start freaking out because I'm thinking that I have to go to conference alone and w/ no "moral support." Right when I'm thinking that, Ray comes in and asks if I'm ready. Relief comes over me... and then worry. I don't want to leave Emily, but I can't not go to stake conference, minutes before it starts. Luckily, Emily's friend, Amy, was visiting and was able to take her to urgent care. Ray and I left and got to campus w/ time to spare. It was a pretty chilly night, so I was shivering a little. We walk in and locate the auditorium we were going to be in, and are immediately greeted by the second counselor of our stake presidency, President Ewell. We shake hands and say hello, and as I'm slowly walking away, he asks, "Are you Sister Travis?" I turn and say yes and asked how he knew. I was thinking it was because I had a flower in my ear, but he said it was because I was shivering, so he thought I was nervous to speak. I insisted that it was because I was cold.

I get on stage and meet the other guy I'm speaking w/. He's a pretty cool kid, he served his mission in San Jose, CA (good state, btw) and he was mighty "easy on the eyes!" ;) His topic was the "habit of scripture study." Of course! How perfect is that? Prayer and scripture study. It definitely goes together! As we were sitting there and introducing ourselves, I was telling him a, what I thought to be, funny story about the San Jose mission. I was trying to tell him that my friend at work, Marie, thinks that I served in the California San Jose mission, but it's really the San Bernardino mission. What really came out was, "funny thing about that, my email... I mean she's my roommate, Emily. Not my email. She thinks, wait no. Not my roommate. My friend from work, Marie, often confuses my mission w/ yours. She thinks I served in San Jose." Totally nose dived! What the heck happened?! I know I'm not the most articulate person, normally. But honestly? What happened?! I guess I was so nervous and he was cute and... I don't know. But, as I was making a complete fool out of myself, speaking, the patriarch and his wife came up and was coming to sit next to me. They were saying hello and trying to talk to me as I was trying to finish my disaster of a story, so I got even more flabbergasted. Man, I was figuring it wasn't going to be an easy night of talking. They also asked if Kenny and I were together, or if we were both speaking. It was kind of funny that they asked that, but we were both like, "no, just speaking." Too bad! :)

Well, to get along w/ it all, it turned out to be a really good night! Kenny, the kid I embarrassed myself in front of, spoke first. He was awesome! He had a funny story to start off w/ that totally related and was a good example, he gave experiences, he read scriptures. He even used the commitment pattern! He issued the commitment of having daily scripture study, explained why we should do it, bore testimony, and promised blessings! I was figuring that he hadn't been home too long from his mission, since he was still good at the commitment pattern. But, his talk made me want to do better at being consistent in my scripture study. I was already planning it, but more inspiration!

My turn! I get up and thoughts are just racing. "What am I gonna say? Is it all gonna make sense? What if I draw a blank? Will I take enough time? Will I talk too long? Will I ramble more than usual?" All these random things were going on in my head and I was freaking out at how nervous and anxious I was becoming. Anyways, I'm giving my talk and reading some things from Elder Nelson and Elder Perry, and I'm thinking it's going pretty good. By the end of it all I'm speaking about my experiences and how I'm working on my "habit of prayer" and trying to make my prayers more meaningful. I then challenge everyone to do the same. Not anything specific, but just to take the next step w/ their prayers. For me, I was working on kneeling when I pray. Now, I'm working on adding in consistent scripture study, to receive answers to my prayers. I mean, we as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, have a "habit of prayer" already. It isn't a new concept. We've been exposed to it from day one. We are a praying people! We pray in church, we pray at home, we pray for our food, we pray when we are set apart for callings/missions, we pray in the temple. We pray! Honestly, it wasn't a difficult challenge or one that was "way out there," so I felt comfortable extending it.

The concluding speakers were, a bishop from our stake, and our stake president, President Shollenberger. The Bishop spoke on frequenting the temple more often, and President Shollenberger spoke about the theme of our conference and the revelation that is given preparing for the conference and throughout the conference. Their talks were awesome. They definitely spoke w/ the Spirit and I learned a lot from them both. I love the things that we learn in our church meetings! Many times they are repetitive topics, but I know that I am one of those that need to be told more than once, before anything really sticks. I'm pretty sure I've mentioned that before, but it's true!

Thanks for reading my ramblings and hope you continue to. Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

One More Time!

How do you put into words your feelings? It's always such a difficult thing. Sometimes I wish there was a device that you could plug into your head so it would then translate everything into words. It's interesting how jumbled your thoughts tend to be. If you know me, then you know how random I am. :)

Here's the thing... It's been an intense roller coaster ride in life lately, and I've been trying hard to hold on and brace myself for the next turn. For the most part I feel like I've done a pretty good job, but I am still having a bit of difficulty. I talk about how I'm finally moving on from "ancient history," and yet, I find myself thinking about it more than I should let myself. I wonder, why he did what he did or, why he continues to do what he's doing or, "what was he thinking?" Soon after, I reevaluate my thinking into, "why are you even concerned about him? He doesn't care about you anymore, so why should you care about him?" I then think about what it is I'm supposed to learn from all of this. I have yet to figure it out completely, but I have an idea. I think that through this ridiculous heart ache and pain, I need to realize that, I AM strong! I AM capable! I AM worth so much more! I DO deserve more! Too many times in life we short change ourselves. We settle. We get too complacent.

At this time of my life, I have realized that I have been waiting for the "next big thing." I complain that I don't feel like anything is happening in my life. I complain that I feel like I'm not progressing. I complain about how I wish there was something or someone to tell me what I should be doing w/ my life right now. I hate growing up. :) I miss the days when other people made decisions for me. Those days were good... mostly.

I was talking to Karyn earlier today and she shared a story of "revelation." It's interesting that we've talked about this "ah-ha" moment before, but in different ways and in different words. Basically, she realized that things aren't happening in her life, because she isn't making them happen. How truer can that be? It was so simple and yet, more powerful than all the other conversations we've had about the same thing. If I want my life to go a certain way, or if there is something that I want in life, I need to make it happen. If I don't want to be struggling financially anymore, than I need do better at budgeting, and saving my money. If I want to see the world, then I need to figure out ways that I can make that happen. If I want to lose weight and be more healthy, I need to change my eating habits and exercise. I can't sit around expecting life to come to me. I have to go out and take life into my own hands and make the most of it!

During General Conference weekend, there's so much that is taught. So much that makes you think. So much that makes you want to change. We have our favorite talks and we can't wait for the Ensign to come out so we can read and study them again. But after that, nothing happens. That's why there is so much repetition in the church. It takes us more than once to really internalize something. I mean think about it, how many times were you prompted by the Holy Ghost to do something, before you actually listened? Not many of us can honestly say, "once." I have definitely been one of those that was told multiple times and practically yelled at by the Spirit, to listen. It's the same concept. You have to hear it a multitude of times and in various ways, before it really sticks!

Moral of the story... if you want something to happen, YOU need to make it happen. Don't be afraid it do it. Shoot for the moon, if you miss, you'll be among the stars. Or however the quote goes. "Trust in the Lord w/ all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6) Too often do I forget to trust in the Lord. Too many times I think that I'm leaning on Him too much or that I'm totally burdening Him w/ my problems. In all honesty, that's what He's there for. Take hold of His outstretched hand and step onto the rocks to cross the rushing waters of the winding river. "Be not afraid." Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

New Paint

It's interesting how life works sometimes.

As you can tell from previous posts, I went through some hard times recently. I thought it would've taken a lot longer to get over. But, I've been praying a LOT for strength to move on and to get over it. I half expected myself to take a LONG time, again. Last time, I thought I was over and done w/ it, and that was over 3 years ago. But then it came out of the woodwork and threw a fast one at my face! So naturally, I figured it would take a while again. Well, w/ fervent prayer and family and friends to talk to, it's been so much easier! In fact, I'm so over the whole thing and frankly quite upset over it, that I've built the bridge and am SPRINTING over it.

Of course it was over a stupid boy... yes boy! Luckily, I have a super awesome friend, Carrie Belle, that has been wanting to set me up w/ some guys she knows. She moved to Orem a few months ago and we have since reunited. She is married and has a little girl now, but has quite a few single friends... yay for me! Well, the one she was talking about for a while, was a missionary in her old ward, in Maryland. Our schedules have been busy so we haven't been able to meet up and have him there too. She later told me about two other boys, last week. She said that they are brothers to one of her friends/ mission companions. She wanted to have a dinner and invite these two brothers and me. I thought, at first, that would be kinda awkward for them since they'd both be there for me. Great for me, but weird for them. :) Well, I almost thought it wouldn't happen for a while, because again, my schedule has been packed over the weekends lately. Which is way weird, since that pretty much never happens! Anyways, one thing dropped off my schedule and created an opening. Last night was the dinner! We had it and her friend's house w/ her husband and two kids, Carrie and her husband, Hector, and their baby, Isabella, the two brothers and me.

We talked for a little while and then had dinner. Talked more during and after. We eventually moved back into the living room and continued talking. I am so shy when I meet people. I'm sure as you are reading this, you're like, "What? Leo, shy?" I know! I really am shy though. It takes me a little while until I'm not shy, and then once I know you and feel comfortable, there's no shutting me up. :) Anyway, I didn't talk too much. I was involved in the conversation of course, but I was mostly listening, and playing w/ the kids. Which is what the older brother, David, was doing as well. The younger one, Bob, left after dinner.

I'm not gonna lie, I was looking at David all night. I think he's cute and seems really cool. He asked me a few questions through the night, but we really didn't talk. It got late, so we finally decided to leave. We said our goodbyes and he left too.

Carrie went to talk to David at his car, while I got into ours. She asked him, "So nothing? No interest?" He said, "No, I am! I don't know what happened." Apparently he was nervous and shy too. He told Carrie that he's shy in group settings.

As we were driving me home, we talked about the evening. I told Carrie beforehand that I was gonna be shy and nervous, so it wasn't that much of a surprise on my side. Hector said there was definite interest from both of us. So true! Hector said that David was looking at me all night, when I wasn't looking. I was doing the same thing. He also said that David stayed for me. Because as soon as we said we were leaving, David got up to leave too. If he wasn't interested, he would've left earlier.

Carrie planned for us all to go to the "Haunted Forest" in American Fork, on Thursday. I was excited 'cause that's a perfect opportunity for me to hang on David, w/o it being too weird. Hahaa! But I hear that's why guys go to haunted houses w/ girls. ;) I'm excited to see how it works out! I'm so twitterpated right now! I really hope that this time we'll be able to talk and get to know each other a little more.

The point of the story, I almost forgot, was that even though life seems like it's never gonna stop being hard, and like you're stuck in a deep whole, w/ no way to get out... All of a sudden, it gets easier and a rope is thrown down for you to climb out. I say a rope, because you still have to work your way out. As you do, you get stronger and smarter so you don't do it again. Life sucked for the last month. But this one night, after I decided to get over the past, made my day. It was like sanding off the old paint and then putting a fresh coat on. W/o being able to see it anymore, the old color of the paint will be forgotten and only the new one will be remembered or thought about. Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

Work schedules

I just realized today that my work schedule for Wednesdays and Thursdays aren't "ideal." I work Wednesday nights @ CPK (California Pizza Kitchen) until close, meaning I won't get off 'til about 10pm. Thursdays I work @ the DC (Distribution Center) from 7am-4pm. Basically, I come home and then have to go to sleep, only to wake up about 5 hours later. I know that there are tons of people in the world that don't even get that much sleep, but since I haven't been working as much as I used to, the lack of sleep this one night a week really sucks.

Luckily, I make it through the day just fine, but as soon as 4pm comes rolling up, I start winding down. Last week, I came home and took a 2 hour nap. I was supposed to go do errands w/ Emily and Pohai, but instead I crashed.

Oh, and P.S. I just got another shift added to my schedule @ CPK, so I will now have one night and one day! Woo-hoo! Thanks Melissa! Now, I will have 3-4 shifts a week between my jobs. I used to have 4 shifts @ CPK and 3 shifts @ the DC. It looks like I worked 7 days a week, but I only worked 6. I miss those days. Mostly because I was busy and I didn't have time to whine so much. :) But, mostly I miss it 'cause I made more money, so I could better pay my bills! Those were "the good ol' days." Now, I just sit around @ home and play on the computer or couch potato it up. Lame, I know. That's why I decided to start a blog. Keep me "ocupado" a little longer. Ooh, if you have any ideas about things I should blog about, hit a sister up! I'd love ideas on things to write about. I secretly enjoy writing, but I don't do it as much because I think you need to be a completely AMAZING writer to be worth reading. Oh well, you're stuck w/ me. :) Until next time my dear friends... "this concludes our broadcasting."

Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

From under...

I don't know how you feel about Britney Spears, but I really like her. I'm totally excited that she's made an awesome comeback and I've found some inspiration in her songs. It's interesting because in intermediate and high school, I didn't like her, but I liked her music. I hated when people said that about *NSYNC. I just didn't understand how that worked, until I felt the same way about Britney.

On her latest album, "Circus" there is a song called "Out From Under." I've had it for about 6 months now and never realized what the song was talking about. I've listened to the whole album repeatedly, but there was only a few songs that I really listened to. This one in particular, became a favorite over the last week. It came to me one morning. I woke up singing, "from under, from under," which is part of the chorus. But, I didn't know the words to the song. Those were the only words I knew. I thought about it all day, and finally decided to listen to it. Once I did, I was so happy to find the words to express what I was feeling at that moment. My roller coaster ride down "memory lane" brought on feelings that I didn't know what to do w/. After listening to this song, it gave me the strength I needed to heal and move on. It's on my playlist, to the right.

"Out From Under "

Breathe you out
Breathe you in
You keep coming back to tell me
You're the one who could have been
And my eyes see it all so clear
It was so long ago and far away but it never disappears
I try to put it in the past
Hold on to myself and don't look back

[Chorus]
I don't want to dream about
All the things that never were
Maybe I can live without
When I'm out from under
I don't want to feel the pain
What good would it do me now
I'll get it all figured out
When I'm out from under
(from under, from under, from under, from under)

So let me go
Just let me fly away
Let me feel the space between us growing deeper
And much darker every day
Watch me now and I'll be someone new
My heart will be unbroken
It will open up for everyone but you
Even when I cross the line
It's like a lie I've told a thousand times

[Chorus]

And part of me still believes
When you say you're gonna stick around
And part of me still believes
We can find a way to work it out
But I know that we've tried everything we could try
So let's just say goodbye
Forever

[Chorus]
From under, from under, from under, from under

Don't underestimate the power of music! I feel that the reason it's such a huge thing in everyone's life, is because we are able to convey so much emotion through it. Of course the written word itself is able to convey just as much emotion but I feel that it's the words combined w/ the music that give it a more powerful meaning. Think about all the times that you experienced, that were hard. What got you through it? I bet that, other than family and friends, it was music or "that" song. Seriously... think about it. Tell me what you think. Tell me what it was. Tell me, how you deal w/ things now. No doubt... music is in there somewhere. Think about it, "food for thought." Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

E Komo Mai!

Aloha, and welcome to my blog! I am so excited that you've stopped by. Here's to a new hobby, and fun times!

A quick disclaimer- I am random and often my thoughts don't always relate. So as you read, do not be surprised on how twisted my comments and stories become. By twisted I mean, how fast it turns into something else, without warning. But in the end, it usually connects... somehow.

I assume that whoever is reading this, already knows me, so there isn't much point of going into a whole life story. If you are someone I don't already know, then this will be a new experience for the both of us. You'll just have to catch up and try to put things together as we go. :)

Life thus far has been a... roller coaster ride of emotions. Recently I took an unexpected trip down "memory lane." It's almost as if I was thrown on a plane, not knowing my destination and not being anywhere near prepared for it. However, this unexpected trip was one of self-discovery and growth. It's amazing how life throws situations at you. Sometimes you are able to catch it, and other times, you get hit in the face hard. I haven't fully realized yet, if I caught this one or if my face actually is hurting from lack of catching. Only time will tell, but at least for now, nothing is flying at my face, full speed.

There are a few people in my life that have become my "go to" sources. These wonderful ladies have been my source of inspiration, insight, and for lack of a better word, logic. I always seem to know what they will say, but it somehow is always different and kind of an "a-ha" moment when they are the ones that say it to me. I guess what I'm saying is.. thanks for being there and thanks for always understanding me, even when I don't understand, myself. And for anyone who has their own "go to" people, don't underestimate them. They have become your "go to" people for a reason. Love them, show them that you love them, and be there for THEM. One of these wonderful ladies told me something today that I want to share w/ you. During our conversation, I mentioned that I felt like a turtle in the situation I was dealing w/. Where it was stuck on my back and I was moving so slowly forward, still attached to it. She then said, "I like to think of you as a hermit crab, where you can leave the old shell behind and find a bigger shell, so you can grow." She later said, "don't let other people dictate how valuable you are."


So, in a nut shell... remember that when life comes at you fast and hard, you're not alone. You have so many people behind you and around you, that are more than willing to back you up. You have a team, remember that there is no "I" in team. Life is easier when others are there to pick you up when you've fallen hard, because you couldn't catch what was thrown at you. Try not to hold on to things for so long. I know I do. I hang on to things w/ such a vice grip that it's almost impossible to pry it from my hands. I'm trying this new thing of letting go. Definitely not an easy concept for me, but something I am desperately trying to acheive. I'm not talking about holding grudges, I'm talking about holding on to the past. Just let it go. Free yourself and free anyone or anything that has kept you from moving on. You can do it!

I better end this. Otherwise this will become the longest post, ever written. :) Thanks for coming by and I hope you will continue to do so. Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!