A little something for me!

Last week I was surfing on the net and remembered a pair of shoes I had once. A friend of mine bought them for me and they were pretty expensive. I felt bad about it and so a few weeks later, returned them. Well, I've been wanting to buy them myself but they are kind of hard to find.

As I was surfing I realized I could try to order them online. I desperately started to look for these wonderful shoes. Jessica Simpson shoes. Purple patent leather. Called "Vanity." They were my first pair of heels. My first pair of a non-neutral color. My first pair of "awesome but uncomfortable. "

Long story short, I wasn't successful in finding these shoes, unused. Instead I ended up getting these beauties!

And they were on sale for less than $50! From the Jessica Simpson website. Oh the sweet little joys in life! Haha, and the funny thing is that as I am typing this, my ipod is on shuffle and the only Jessica Simpson song I have came on. I love it!

It's interesting that they came today. I've been waiting for them for, what seemed like, forever. It's been a weird last few days for me. These came and brightened up my day! I know they're only shoes and really don't mean anything in the broad spectrum of life, but it's the little insignificant things in life that can often bring much needed happiness. Yes, it's going to end up a short-lived happiness, but I'll at least be happy for a little while, right? :)

Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!

Ju gotta-nutter yob?

In case you thought I wasn't doing anything in Utah... I really am doing things. Mostly working.Like for real! I've had two jobs for almost two years now. Apparently i didn't think I was doing enough w/ my time because I just got a THIRD job! But, I realize it sounds crazy, but it's really not. I still have the Distribution Center and CPK, but I am also nanny-ing now. :) I am so excited! I'll be nanny-ing Mon-Thu, and then working at the DC on Fri & Sat. As for CPK, I'll be picking up shifts as I go. Although, this schedule is temporary. I'm gonna see how it all works out and may or may not ending up dropping one or both jobs. Wish me luck!

This is Isabella. Ella es mi hija. (She is my daughter) Well kinda... This is the cutie that I get to play w/ all week!

Become today!

05 February 2010

Dear Diary- Have you ever been hurt so bad that it takes too long to get over it? Have you ever thought that after years of hurt, you're "okay" only to learn that you really aren't? Well, I know I've talked about this before, but I don't know how to make it go away.

Why the whole "dear diary" thing? I just finished watching "Tyler Perry's; Diary of a Mad Black Woman." I've seen about half of it on TV and finally rented it and watched it all the way through. It's interesting to watch something in a movie or a TV show, that is so similar to something that you've lived through. One part in particular, stuck out to me.

Myrtle: You know I know this man put a hurtin' on you baby, but you've got to forgive him. No matter what he done, you've got to forgive him - not for him, but for you.

Helen: Forgive him for me?
Myrtle: When some body hurts you they take power over you, if you don't forgive them then they keeps the power. Forgive him baby and after you forgive him, forgive yourself.

How much truer can it get? I've tried and thought it worked but I guess not. I know that one of these days I will forgive. Never forget, I'm sure, but once I forgive him, I NEED to forgive myself too! It's so hard! Strength will be on my side and I will overcome. I cannot let this have any kind of power over me. I want to be done.

In the movie, Helen is thrown out of her home after 18 years of marriage. She finally is moving on and taking care of herself and becoming the woman she didn't know she was. One day she sees on TV that her soon to be ex-husband, had been shot. She finds out that because he was shot in the back, the bullets were close to his spine. After surgery it left him temporarily paralyzed. She basically runs back to him and takes care of him, but not after hurting him first. Making him see the error of his ways in the way he treated her and what not. I was so mad at her for leaving the new man that she fell in love w/ for the one that practically damaged her. But in all honesty, I could relate. I was upset at myself for it, but it happens.

One day, I will forgive him. One day, I will forgive myself. One day, will be sooner than later! One day, will become... today!

Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!