Do you remember when I talked about a guy from my past coming back, and how everything was crazy for me? And how much I hurt after we initially broke up and never really got over it, after all these years? Well, I was talking to Karyn about it about a month ago, and I found out some things that I wish I found out when it actually happened. I basically found out that he wasn't "true" to me when we were dating, and he wasn't just flirting. I just wish that I found this out sooner, because I feel like it would've helped me to get over him a long time ago instead of having him linger. I basically thought it was because of me that he broke it off and that something was wrong w/ me. Knowing this makes me realize that he was just a jerk, using me for, I don't know what. However, Karyn said that when she tried to tell me, I wasn't listening. I'm sorry. I'm hard headed. Just sit me down and tell me point blank, if it happens again. And I hope it DOESN'T happen again.
After finding this out, I haven't thought about him as much as I usually do. Not that I sit around looking for a reason to think about him and reminisce. It's just that we had so many memories that things some time trigger memories of him. I also don't feel bad, anymore, about the drama in his life. I've been able to cut off more strings that has kept me attached to him. I know that there are a few more left, but I doubt those will ever give way. At least now there aren't as many as before. I'm happy to say that I am "dangling by a thread."
I've decided to steal Karyn's idea, for the day, of having a "song of the day." She also suggested this song. Be strong, be happy, and find the joy in your life!
"Give You Hell"
by The All-American Rejects
I wake up every evenin' with a big smile on my face
And it never feels out of place.
And you still probably workin' at a 9 to 5 pace
I wonder how bad that tastes
Chorus:
When you see my face
Hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
Hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell
Now where's your picket fence, love?
And where's that shiny car?
And did it ever get you far?
You never seemed so tense, love
I've never seen you fall so hard
Do you know where you are?
And truth be told I miss you
And truth be told I'm lyin'
Chorus
If you find a man that's worth damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool, you're just as well, hope it gives you hell
I hope it gives you hell
Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself
Yeah, where did it all go wrong?
But the list goes on and on
Truth be told I miss you
And truth be told I'm lyin'
Chorus
If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool, you're just as well, hope it gives you hell
Chorus
When you hear this song and sing along, we'll you'll never tell
And you're not a fool, I'm just as well, hope it gives you hell
When you hear this song I hope that it will give you hell
You can sing along, I hope that it puts your through hell